Today, February 21, 2017, marks 4 years since my sweet mama went home to meet Jesus.
In some ways it seems like just yesterday. In many ways it seems like it’s been forever.
There’s not a day that goes by where I don’t think of her and long for her. We shared a very special relationship that I will forever cherish. We were best friends.
Grief lingers. Grief hurts unimaginably. Grief robs happiness. Grief separates friends. Grief brings distress. Grief changes us.
I can truly say that my grief has changed me in deep ways. I am not the same person as I was before. Through my grief, I have come to love Jesus in a way I had only longed for and imagined prior to Mom’s death.
I read this question this week from one of my favorite books, New Morning Mercies, by Paul Tripp -“When hardship comes your way, will you tell yourself it’s a tool of God’s grace and a sign of his love, or will you give in to doubting his goodness?” Continue reading Goodness and Grace in the Grief
Since losing my mom, one of the best decisions I’ve ever made is to seek help from a professional Christian counselor.
God has used my counselor to speak truth into my life when I couldn’t feel or think truth for myself.
God has used my counselor to encourage my broken heart and offer hope for tomorrow when I felt there was none.
God has used my counselor to assure me that my feelings were normal and understandable in relation to my circumstances.
God has used my counselor to offer wisdom to me in seeking additional helps for healing.
In so many ways, God has used His people (my Christian counselors) to bring help and healing in my life. Continue reading It’s Ok to Ask for Help
I am loved by an amazing God.
I am wondrously showered with redeeming grace.
I am healing from the deep wounds of your death.
I am confident that God is writing my story . . . and it’s a beautiful one.
Today marks your 4th birthday spent with Jesus. Still seems impossible this could be true . . . but it is. I can’t even begin to imagine how awesome your days must be-no pain, no anxiety, no fear, no heartbreaks. Just sheer joy in the presence of your Savior. Continue reading It’s Your Birthday
We were here. Again. For the second time.
Lauryn, with a terrified look on her face, climbed apprehensively into the dentist’s chair. She knew what was ahead. She had been through this before!
Having four teeth pulled was no joy-ride. It was rather horrific to a ten year old girl who struggles very much with fear of pain.
As I gently held both of her hands in mine, I winced in my own heart as she strangled my fingers with her death grip. I knew she was terrified! As her tears began to flow freely into the sides of her hair, my own tears welled up within my eyes. As she tried to resist the pain and endure the struggle to remain in that chair, I thought of how often I try to resist pain. Pain that I know in my mind will be worth it. But pain that my heart can barely seem to endure. Continue reading The Dentist & My Father’s Love
I’m reminded of the story of Jacob in the OT. Recently I read this as it relates. . .
“A long time ago, a preacher named James H. McConkey asked a friend of his, a doctor, ‘What is the exact significance of God’s touching Jacob upon the sinew of his thigh?’”
“And the doctor told him, ‘The sinew of the thigh is the strongest in the human body. A horse couldn’t even tear it apart.’”
These are the words I’ve never forgotten, what preacher McConkey said. “Ah, I see. The Lord has to break us down at the strongest part of our self-life before He can have His own way of blessing in us.” (One Thousand Gifts– Ann Voskamp)
God breaks us in order to give us the greatest treasure—the blessing of Himself! He desires that we be filled with all the fullness of Christ. Continue reading Filled with All the Fullness of God-Part Two
Tears already fill my eyes as I try to write words here.
Yesterday I sat on my front steps of the porch and watched big tears roll down my oldest boy’s cheeks. I listened intently to the sadness in his voice as he expressed confusion and bitterness in losing his meme- my mom.
“Everything has been different since Meme died. Life has seemed so hard since that day. Nothing has gone right, Mom.” Continue reading Helping Your Children Grieve with Truth
This past Sunday, my husband and I were privileged to attend a life class (small group) led by my brother-in-law Ryan. As we began studying the Word from I Peter 3, our hearts were directed to verse 8. I Peter 3:8 reads, “Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.”
In our discussion of this verse, we came to the word sympathy. Ryan asked the group to share a definition or application for sympathy.
Immediately, my mind thought of a sympathy card! I have given out many sympathy cards to others who are grieving. Unfortunately, I also know exactly what it feels like to receive one of those cards. After Mom’s death, my mailbox was flooded with sympathy cards. While I am extremely grateful for each expression of love and sympathy that showed itself in the form of a card, I have learned from experience that Biblical sympathy extends much deeper than just a card! Continue reading Sympathy Is More Than a Card
I can’t help but think about my sweet mama a lot this week. Wow! Only You know how every thought is filled with her memory! It seems I can’t escape her presence. . ..although she’s not really here anymore.
Sometimes it still seems so unreal that she is now with You. . .but I’m glad she’s safe now and has found her joy again. But the ache of missing her buries deep within my bosom. My chest hurts with the pain of losing my best friend and mentor. The questions of her death run deep within my mind. Continue reading From my journal. . . .Mother’s Day 2013